Just a couple of weeks ago, I was on the verge of buying Rose Bowl tickets.  BYU had a victory against Oklahoma in its rear view mirror, a shiny No. 7 ranking in the AP Poll, and saw few obstacles in its route to an undefeated season, a BCS Bowl berth, and, dare I say it, a shot at the National Championship.  “So why not buy Rose Bowl tickets?” I thought.  Pasadena is less than an hour away, and odds are excellent that BYU is going to be there.  And besides, if the sky falls on BYU I can always scalp them later.  Nothing can possibly go wrong!  Tra-la-la, oh happy day!”

Just hours later, Florida State went wrong.  Horrifically so.  No tickets were bought.

So why is this story on an Oakland fansite?  Just replace me with Billy Beane, “the Rose Bowl” with the AL West Division Championship, “tickets to the Rose Bowl” with Matt Holliday, Jason Giambi, Orlando Cabrera and Nomar Garciaparra, “scalp the tickets” with trade Holliday for a third baseman, and “Florida State” with “the 2009 Season.”  It’s a perfect analogy, except that Billy Beane already bought the tickets.

And Brett Wallace or no Brett Wallace, the plan sucked.

Thank you for your patience with CBCity’s three-month layoff.  I promise to chime back in shortly with my third annual, “Well, This Season Didn’t Suck So Much After All!” column.  It’ll be a humdinger.

P.S. Another piece of the Holliday trade, Clayton Mortensen of Rexburg, ID and presumably coming from fine, sugar beet harvesting stock, was arrested Saturday night on DUI charges.  Your bishop is not happy right now, Clayton.

UPDATE: Following Sunday’s game, Mortensen issued a pretty sincere-sounding apology:

“Calling my dad this morning was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’m deeply embarrassed for what I’ve done and my poor judgment. I can honestly say it will never happen again. I’m very ashamed and embarrassed. … I’m really sorry for everything I caused.”

It is either a sign of my Christian charity or my severely-misplaced priorities that I am far more willing to forgive his DUI than I am his 54 ERA+.       

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